This is your captain Dylan speaking. Just wanted to remind you all that we are NOT sinking.
Now, I can understand your confusion. I'm looking out on the deck now and quite a lot of things are sliding in roughly the same direction, which is something most people associate with a sinking ship.
But need I remind you that this ship CANNOT be sunk. With that obvious fact in mind, let's turn to alternate explanations, shall we?
Ghosts. Ghosts are a perfectly valid explanation for all of the events currently taking place on board. And wouldn't it be just like a ghost to trick you into thinking we're sinking?
Some of you are also screaming about an iceberg or something. I didn't see it myself, but my guess? Giant ghost. So what if we hit one? Ghosts aren't even tangible, people!
It's what I always say: You need to keep positive, especially when you're on a NOT-sinking ship with no more lifeboats or any other means of escape.
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